As part of my ongoing series covering the imminent death of Western
civilisation, I bring you the
chemical-free chemistry
set. I think this is the inevitable
result of a few of the trends in our society, partly the War on Some
Drugs but also the infantilisation of childhood.
Guess what, parents—your kids won’t grow up if you
don’t let them! When I was a boy Mom & Dad bought us these
great chemistry sets with all sorts of poisonous and caustic chemicals,
and yet we didn’t kill ourselves or anyone else (no, not even with
the cobalt or the cyanide). And I was playing with that stuff at the
age of 8 or maybe even younger. By the time one is 10, one is
definitely old enough to use real, potentially nasty chemicals—or
suffer the consequences. But this set is absurd. Growing crystals is
for kindergarteners; slime and gook
and bubbles are
for toddlers.
Worried about your kids hurting themselves? Here’s a radical idea: supervise them! Or here’s another radical idea: tell them what not to do, and why not to do it, and expect to be obeyed. If they’ve not learnt obedience by the age of ten, their lives are in for some pain anyway.
We are doomed, all of us: doomed.
